Accidental Guardian
by Debbie Dai-chan
Summary: Knuckles muses over his 'new role'.


Author's Note:

Just thoughts I have on Knuckles' and Sonic's friendship through the games. I LOVE the way they interact with each other. There is always a warmth from them, even in the fights, and I feel so inspired and touched every time.

Or maybe it's just the fangirlness in me . . .

Disclaimer! Sonic and Knuckles are copyrighted to Sonic Team! The story and its off-the-subject-ness is mine!

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Accidental Guardian

By Debbie (Dai-chan)

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Really, I never knew this could've happened. He didn't know, either. He never asked me. And I never asked him. It just . . . happened.

But I think that we do know, somewhat unknowingly, and during the years of knowing each other, we probably already figured out that it was better to accept this.

As I look back to the past, our past, yes, I realize how much we've changed. So what if that sounds corny? It is true. Very true, perhaps too true. We've changed, and if the others never notice . . . well, that's their problem. Because it's not our problem. But it isn't a surprise to us if the others haven't noticed.

We used to fight. A lot. With all the fights we ended up starting because one little thing provoked either of us, you'd think we'd never co-exist in peace. No surprise here. We used to think so, too.

I still remember the fights. He was so good at the provoking. His other 'weapon' beside his speed. Wearing that lazy, arrogant grin, he would start unraveling at impassive demeanor, well-aimed words breaking down the shield until I lose my mind and want to punch him in the face so I don't have to see that damn grin again.

He didn't have to work hard to do that. My temper is fiery and I have a rather weak leash on it. Too easily, I let myself loose the temper and I ended up 'at the receiving end' as he joked.

But rarely, I'd let the fights be one-sided. He used words to provoke. I used my own fists to counter. He learned fast after the first couple of punches that nearly broke his ribs and jaws. But he didn't learn wisely and of course, some more words later, we'd collapse from sheer exhaustion, no matter how long our stubbornness stood.

Sometimes, the others would let us fight so they won't have to deal with us afterward.

Smart.

But . . .

Hm, I don't know why we always end up fighting. I suppose it's because we are so different. Not surprising, you think? I suppose not.

Still, I have to say I couldn't imagine my life without him. Not anymore.

Before, I was alone. Well, not alone in that sense, but solitary, secluded. A hermit by law. I had a duty and it was to guard the Master Emerald from any kind of danger. And I was supposed to do it alone. Which was fine with me. I've known solitude all my life, and that was all I knew, followed, and became. I was always alone, but never lonely. I didn't even know the meaning of loneliness. It wasn't even in my vocabulary!

I was at peace. I never knew a familiar touch. Never heard a familiar word nor noticed an intimate glance. Never part of my life and so I never knew what I missed.

Until I met him.

Damn him.

From the first encounter, he never left my mind. Now, don't take me wrong. It wasn't like an obsession or even a desire. He was just . . . there. He was there in my mind even as he chased me, trying to get the Chaos Emeralds back. He was there even as I faced Dr. Eggman and lost. He was there as I waited for his safety from outer space with the Master Emerald. He had left his imprint and it never left nor faded.

Mind you, I've tried to forget him, to erase his existence from where I found it. It wasn't out of anger at all. It was that I felt . . . invaded. Raided, Changed. He has stolen something from me and replaced it with a gaping hole the shape of him inside me. He stole my solitude and replaced it with . . .

For the first time, I actually felt lonely.

I actually _missed _his company. I even missed his damn grin and wisecracks.

_I missed him. _

Damn!

It was SO unpleasant that I must've denied that powerfully, refused to believe that I missed someone. Never mind that this person was a rival. I can do without a rival. I missed someone that could be a friend. My friend. I've denied it for days, weeks, months. Tried to gather what left of my solitude and moved on. And I almost did.

Sometimes, even to the day, I wonder if it was wrong to be relieved that I was once again pulled in another adventure.

When Chaos escaped himself from the remains of the Master Emerald, I was dragged along with him, rather unwillingly and forcedly. But . . . honestly, I thought this could be quick. Just try to gather the pieces and coaxing Chaos back in the stone. Nothing more, nothing less. That was my plan.

What I didn't expect was him, coming in like the hero he was. Only that it wasn't my island he was saving, it was the entire world. And you know what? I was actually happy just being in his company, even though I was misled to believe he was stealing my Chaos Emeralds. Excuse me for being gullible, I have a reason!

And what I'm about to tell you may seem . . . weird. When he was about to face Perfect Chaos, I felt something odd from him. It was only a gesture from him, I was sure, but a gesture that I'd never, NEVER expect.

He turned his back toward me.

For a long, bizarre moment, I had a feeling that something was building between us. I want to say 'trust', and yet it was something more from him. Like . . . surrendering?

Hey, I know what you are thinking. _'Sonic? Surrendering? That's no good!'_

I was disbelieved, too! And I was unnerved at the intensity of the gesture that I was relieved when he faced us afterward, flashing that damn confident grin. Then I spent more days, weeks, months pondering over the odd gesture. I never went to ask him why. I didn't think he knew he was doing it. I didn't think he ever knew. And I don't want to ask him about that. But the gesture confused me, again breaking the fragile solitude I had around me. He still never left my mind and I still thought about him every day. Not about what he was doing at the very moment, but what he was really like.

Well, actually, I more often snarled and grumbled at the memories than pondering quietly.

Still, I thought I was finally out of adventures and relaxed at last. But noooo, that stupid bat girl had to push her nose in and locked her greedy eyes on the Master Emerald. And at top of THAT, I had to break the stone again so Dr. Eggman won't have it.

Sigh . . .

Sometimes, I wonder if I start to act like Sonic - reckless.

Yet another adventure and I got myself in his company. Yes, I felt relieved because the gaping hole was filled in - by him. He didn't provoke me this time. He didn't run off on his own this time. He let me tag along. Believe me, I'd have said no and departed on my own, but not this time. I did want to stay with him. To be a rival. To be a friend. To be . . . a guardian.

And when he turned his back toward me, just like before, I wasn't freaked out. Somehow, I was prepared and came to understand his gesture. He was surrendering his back so it could be watched by someone else, instead. And I was chosen to do it. It just happened in a blink. When he moved forward, I stayed behind, eyes on his back, to reassure him that I was present, that I was here to watch his back.

And somehow, unconsciously, he was relieved. I did feel it. I did see it. As we, the team, wandered through the desert of Sand Ocean and outer space, the surrender was still present. The trust between us didn't waver. He trusted me just enough to lean against me in an exhausted limp after he used Chaos Control. I trusted him just enough to let him. I still recall the relaxed body against me, the surrender, the trust through the touch, and I felt my own determination support him.

Being a Guardian of the Master Emerald came to me easily, for it was in my blood, and when I became his guardian, I had no second thoughts.

I had a friend. He accepted me and even saw me as his guardian. He never asked. I never asked. A gesture was all that was shown.

And our trust grew.

We still fight, but rarely. My temper still flares at him, but rarely. He still provokes me, but rarely. I find myself laughing more. He finds himself thinking more. Yes, thinking more. We rarely talk in silence. We don't need to. We've grown so close that no words are needed to be exchanged. A glance, a gesture, a smile; they are more than enough.

I don't know if he's acting like a guardian to me. If he does, I don't notice. Which doesn't matter to me. He's not suited as a guardian, of course not. He's an adventurer, a hunter, a traveler. A free spirit. If I have a word for that, I'd say he's my guide. Leading me forward, taking me to adventures when I don't have guts to do so. He could be pushing behind me, but then I won't have anybody's back to watch. And he doesn't need to watch my back.

So he always goes first and I come last. He goes first because he knows he has to drag the bland, stubborn echidna forward and enjoys it. I come last because I know I need to watch his back so the blue, spiked idiot won't die by a coward.

we know we are part of each other. He has mentioned a saying about two sides of a coin. That fits us. We are so different and yet we are eerily alike. He's loud. I'm quiet. He's like the wind, while I'm a mountain. He likes prolonged fights for thrills. I prefer my battles short and quick.

And yet, we understand each other so well. He needs a bit of my quiet so he can relax. I need a bit of his loudness so I can feel alive. I'm his mountain when he needs to slow down. He's my wind when I need to move on.

We need each other. We probably are too stubborn to realize that, and still, we know that as truth. When he gives me a soft, too-quiet glance or a feather-light touch upon my shoulder, he's telling me that he's tired and needs support. When I give him a rare smile or a playful shove on his back, I'm telling him that I'm ready for fun.

I can't even imagine a life without him. Really, I've tried. I tried so hard to imagine my life before him, a life that revolved around a mystical, ancient duty, but I couldn't. That life was gone. Just a memory.

And I wasn't the only one in this. He told me once that he did imagine his life without me. He joked that no one was as funny as me while provoked. But he said it with a grateful undertone and I heard it. I took it to heart.

He need me. I need him.

He never asked. I never asked.

It just . . . happened.

And I'm fine with it.

As long as I watch his back as a guardian, I can touch, feel, taste life.

But most of all . . .

Just to be a friend. His friend.

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Never the End


End file.
